“I can do hard things”, this saying (among 5 others) is framed above my son’s crib. When he was born, we decided to hang some positive sayings in his room which will (one day) inspire him, and, I guess in the meantime, inspire us. My son does new and difficult things all the time. I think it is just in the nature of a lot of children. Just this week I saw him navigating a play structure that was likely much beyond his range, without hesitation. Although on some (read: many) days, his toddler-isms can drive me nuts, I am impressed by him.
Like most adults, I don’t like to do things outside of my comfort zone. To be clear, I do difficult things if they are necessary—but I likely won’t volunteer myself for them. I’m just being honest. I know it’s not ideal, but, that’s who I am. Apparently, it is tied to my need for perfection (hence, I prefer to do things which I am good at, which in most cases I would not find hard). If you’ve followed my blog for awhile or checked out my recent posts on Instagram, you’ll notice that I have taken on a few things –all of which I have found pretty difficult. But I have stuck to them, and in return I have taken on some other things—without even realizing it.
To meet my goal of getting healthier, I knew I needed to do more than lengthy walks. Walks were weather and activity dependent, and although they were well needed for me and the little one, I knew that I needed dedicated focus. After much debate and waiting, I decided to join the kickboxing gym for (at least) the summer, with a goal of going 3x a week. This gym wasn’t the cheapest and each time I go, there is at least one trainer present to keep me focused and accountable.
I hate wasting money and I don’t like disappointing people--so this combination pretty much guarantees that I’ll show up.
It was hard to commit, but what was difficult for me was fitting the gym into our evening routine. With only about 2.5 hours between my husband getting in and my son going to sleep, family time is limited, and although the time was carved out for me, it was difficult to want to go. Then, we had one week where evenings were pretty booked and I realized it was going to take a morning, before work time, to get in a workout.
I HATE mornings. Yes, I know “hate” is a strong word. I could equally use, “despise” or “loathe” or something to that effect. I will stay up until the wee hours of the morning, but getting up at 5:30 or 6 am hurts.
Yet, your girl has been getting up before 6:30 multiple times a week to go workout. Why? Because I realized that that time is mine.
While I hate being up and at the gym that early, being there first thing prioritizes my health goal and it is not impacted by how good or bad our day has gone. I also realized how accomplished I feel when I get back. I love that feeling. Not as much as I love chocolate or the beach, but it is good. I can do hard things –in this case two.
Without even realizing it, I took on something else that was difficult. I put myself out there, in a different way. I know, you’re thinking I have this blog, so I am putting myself out there every other week—but this was different. If you’ve been following me for a while, or if you’ve gone back and read my post, you’ll notice that there an article that I wrote that got me thinking about creating this blog (I explain this all here). What you likely don’t know is that that post has been saved on my laptop for about a year now. In fact, until just recently it probably hadn’t even been opened or re-read. Something, and I don’t know what it was, made me think that I should submit it (to the online community I had originally written it for). I contacted them asking if they were still receiving submissions, and then I sat on it when they responded yes. I had all sorts of issues uploading my text as well as filling in the application, which some may have seen as a sign to not bother, but I managed to get it though. Then I waited. I didn’t have to wait long, but after about a week or so of not hearing anything (yes I’m impatient), I figured that I wasn’t going to be chosen. That day, I received an e-mail letting me know that my work was going to be published—that week!
That’s right y’all! In case you missed it, my writing has been published! It’s crazy and exciting and nerve-wracking! But it was there for everyone to see. If you haven’t seen it yet, check it out in Feminessay.
Here’s something I am realizing about difficult things—once you start doing them (and particularly when you start seeing results), it makes it easier to do more hard things. It’s almost as if you’re enlarging your comfort zone.
I can and will do more difficult things—although not necessarily crazy things (no bungee jumping here)—in hopes that I overcome my fear of failure (at best) and try some new things (at least). I hope that you are encouraged to do the same--and start today!
“Doing the difficult things that you’ve never done awakens the talents you never knew you had.” — Robin S. Sharma