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The Change You Seek



Do you remember the movie from the early 2000s called “Pay It Forward” in which a young boy does a good deed to 3 people, with the only catch that they do a good deed for 3 people in return (and so on, and so on)? Well, I was doing something like that throughout the month of April; not in deeds, but in words. However, I had no expectation or “catch’ that people passed it on (so I guess, technically, it as quite different from the movie).

Anyway, I figured that I would pour into someone when the opportunity arose, or when it came to mind.

It wasn’t a forced thing, it was just wherever, or I should say, to WHOMever, my heart led me to.


At the end of March, I was having a very busy week with lots going on, and I was just tired. I can’t recall what I was doing at the time, but I realized that I had a missed call from my oldest sister, before 8AM, which was weird to me. She’d left me a voicemail. As I listened to it, I started to feel emotional and tears began to slowly fall from my eyes. This, I’m sure, wasn’t her intention, but her message made me cry. I don’t recall the exact words of her message now, but the gist of it was as follows: although we live two different types of lives, and she doesn’t always understand my choices, I am doing a great job with the projects that I have taken on (and my son), and that she wanted to encourage me to keep going and keep on following to where I felt like I was being led.


I am not sure who or what inspired her to leave all that on my voicemail, but I am so glad she did. I really needed a dose of encouragement. Sometimes, when I get caught up in a project and the minutiae of it all (the perfectionist in me), it often feels like the scope of the project has grown significantly and that I won’t get it done on time. This leads me to feeling anxious which, sometimes discourages me from wanting to work on something. Anyway, I was feeling a little lost that morning and it completely turned my day around. I shared this with some friends that weekend and encouraged them to pour in to those around them.

I soon decided that I was going to share with people I knew how awesome they were, how talented, thoughtful, strong, smart, etc…

Most often it was a quick text, sometimes it was in the middle of a chat conversation. It felt good to share with people how I felt about them and encourage them—often they told me that it was “perfect timing”. I am so glad that I could be the positive thing in someone’s day. The world has enough negativity as is.


Over the past few weeks, following my post where I wrote about losing track of the “why” of this blog, quite a few readers and friends reached out to me, letting me know how much they enjoy my writing, how much they relate to the content, and encouraged me to keep going. If that was you (whether it was this time, or before that post), thank you so much. I don’t always know which direction my story-telling will go in the future, or how long this will last, and I don’t always know what I want it to be, but I am getting a clearer picture of what I don’t want. It is not always easy for me to put myself out there, and share my inner thoughts and struggles with people around the world (not easy is an understatement, it is straight up difficult). So, I appreciate all the love and support I’ve gotten along the way.


Okay, I’ve been sentimental enough—now it’s your turn. Reach out to some people in your circle and tell them how amazing they are, encourage them in their projects, encourage them in their choices, encourage them in their life decisions. Thank the people who are around you. Say hello, smile and acknowledge your neighbours, cashier, barista, whoever you come in contact with. We are so used to commenting and complaining when service at the supermarket isn’t quick enough, or when that parent can’t seem to get their toddler to “calm down” -- but I promise you, once you start to reach out and be kind, compliment, pour into others you will see those around you change. You will change.


“If we could change ourselves, the tendencies in the world would also change. As a man changes his own nature, so does the attitude of the world change towards him. This is the divine mystery supreme. A wonderful thing it is and the source of our happiness. We need not wait to see what others do.” --Mahatma Gandhi

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